Monday, September 10, 2012

A Boy and His Dog


You're so small and so fragile, yet so full of life. I can't wait to see if you grow to be as big and goofy and friendly as your parents.

You sleep the whole way home, it's been a big day for you, such a friendly little thing.

We name you Sasha, after your mother, she's beautiful and we know that one day you will be too.

Linoleum floors are a new thing to you, we spend hours playing with you and laughing as you slide into the walls, not yet understanding how to stop yourself.

You get spayed to avoid the hassle of puppies, drooling and barely able to walk after your surgery, you're as happy as ever to see us.

The years pass, we're growing up together. You're always there for me when no one else is. I tell you everything.

You're truly my best friend, you know my fears, you alone know how scared I am to grow up. You never judge me, you never tell anyone.

My first breakup; you cuddle with me and slobber on me when I feel like my world is ending, "This is heartbreak" I think aloud, your stinky breath and cold nose assure me that you'd never let me down.

You're getting old in dog years, I'm a young man and you're suddenly an old lady. You don't let it show though, still energetic and goofy, you love to play even when it hurts.

I'm going away to University, to the world I'm brave, full of confidence, and ready for the challenge, only you know that I'm scared to death. You reassure me again, my silent confidant.

Your eyesight is going, and you're getting easy to sneak up on, you don't hear so well these days. Gone are the days where you come running to the door when I get home, now you sleep by the door and don't wake up until it pushes against you.

I tell myself that I'll see you again, though I'm  not so sure.

When I return for the summer and you're barking and jumping up and down happy to see me I known you've got more time.

You still try to jump up on me, but now you've forgotten how to stand on linoleum. It breaks my heart seeing you slip trying to sit upright in the kitchen.

Gone is the grace, the speed, the energy of my best friend. But in your eyes I can see that you remember me, you remember all those years. The days spent in the yard chasing after birds much too high in the air for you to ever catch, barking at passersby hoping they will come say hello.

Standing up is slow and painful for you, some days you can't even climb onto the couch without help. You don't complain, you just sleep on the floor, it's soft enough anyway.

Now I'm going to University again, this time I don't tell you I'm afraid of this big change. I tell you I'm afraid I'll never see you again. You don't seem too concerned, you're just happy to get some attention.

I leave early in the morning, I want to wake you to say goodbye, just in case, but I don't, you need your sleep and I know you'll drive mom crazy with whining if you're awake when I leave.

I can't imagine what I would do without you to confide in, and I wish I could tell you one more time that I love you.

I hope you'll be alright, and I hope that I'll see you again at Christmas...I won't.


No comments:

Post a Comment